Awaken to Self Respect
What does self respect mean to you? The above poster reminds us that we have to take a stand with ourselves in order for others to follow our lead. So how do you carry yourself in relationships? What will you tolerate and what is totally unacceptable? Women are so hard on themselves and often times disrespectful to our bodies and selves. Yet we wonder how we attract such negative male attention/behavior? It’s not rocket science ladies; we must awaken to self respect if anyone else is going to respect us.
Dr Phil says “we teach people how to treat us”. If this is true, and I believe it is, then how we treat ourselves is a direct correlation to the relationships we have with others. We all mirror one another and if I’m feeling a good deal of self loathing inside, then chances are we are going to attract the same in others and wind up bullying each other due to low self-esteem. If we are judgmental of ourselves, chances are that judgement seeps out towards others as well. When we continually reject ourselves and look for love or healing from others, we will always feel rejected and disappointed. I think you get the idea. The point is, you can’t get or attract what you don’t already possess. That is why the most important relationship you need to cultivate is one with yourself. This doesn’t mean to hell with everyone or that an inflated ego will secure happiness, because that couldn’t be further from the truth, but finding security, joy, fulfillment and satisfaction within yourself and your own life is paramount to having a healthy and happy relationship.
All too often I see women throwing themselves at men, sometimes desperately even in order to fulfill needs that must come from within first. Brilliant, gorgeous, and talented women who are looking for love, attention and affection in all the wrong places. For many years, I was that woman so believe me I understand the motives. Yet, until I really knew what I stood for in my life, solidified my values and crafted my own goals & dreams (separate from anyone else), was I ready or able to be a partner to anyone else. Even then it wasn’t a perfect fairy tale ending as real life takes a lot of work; continually focusing on my side of things and ensuring I take care of myself by setting clear boundaries and communicating my needs and wants. Picking my battles instead of waging war. Being willing to confidently be vulnerable and rigorously honest to myself and my partner.
So how does one awaken self-respect? In the small everyday choices that shape the care of one’s Self. By putting your health ahead of your urges or cravings. By recognizing and appreciating the wonderful, beautiful, and amazing person YOU already are. By living your life in the moment, feeling your feelings (regardless of how unpleasant or uncomfortable they may be at times), having a clear vision for your future knowing what you want as well as identifying what you don’t and taking a stand for what you believe to be true for you. Don’t allow others to persuade your reality by telling you that yours is wrong. If they truly care about you and are healthy themselves, they will respect your point of view honoring it and you simultaneously. By valuing your time so that there is plenty for your own self care as well as Spiritual practices. By staying in balance regardless of who you meet. Continuing your usual routine, sleep schedule, eating and exercise habits as well as plans with family and friends. And finally, by staying grounded in the Divine Being you already are. When we forget the essence of who we are, its easy to become unraveled. This is why staying connecting to people who know and love you deeply is essential to fostering solid self-respect. This will also invariably keep you in high self-esteem, confidence, and strength so that you don’t look for validation from people you just met.
My blessing to you is for a great awakening to and continuation of, Self-Respect because YOU are worth it!
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